From Isolated Wallflower to Business Joyologist
Preface: I am breaking my own rules. This is NOT a perfectly orchestrated, strategized “heroine’s journey” story. When I started writing this I didn’t know what it was for, I just felt inspired to write it. Now, having written it, I can share with you that I’ve questioned whether or not I should edit it to be more clean, shorter and share less. I’ve decided against that because that’s what you can get in other places. I really want you to get the full, raw and real story, including the details and confessions that no one really talks about. I want you to get more clear on what YOU really want, and how you are being prepared to make it all happen.
Because the truth is although I’m pretty great at what I do, but like you I’ve questioned myself and wondered why am I not “there” yet. Reading everyone’s success stories wasn’t really helping at the time. I’ve felt completely lost wishing I could just figure out what I was meant to be doing. I’ve felt alone, and I wished I had someone around that would get me. And, I’ve still made my dream a reality, just like you can. That’s why I’m baring it all, even if it may not seem pertinent to business.
[Tweet "Sometimes you’ve just got to throw caution to the wind and trust your instincts. "]
And, my instincts are saying I should share this.Throughout this story you’ll:
See how your unique journey adds value and why you don’t need to compare anymore
Realize how all your ups & downs have prepared you for your next step
Gain clarity on how all your gifts & skills can come together in a focused, profitable way
Know that being you is what YOUR people really want
Feel inspired and motivated to move forward on your own path
I’ll also share my confessions of how building this business has affected my marriage, my thoughts, confidence and more.
*Please note: My dream may look really different from yours. What’s important for you to know is you can to design your business exactly how YOUR heart desires. You might need to set up the foundations to make $25,000, $70,000, $100,000 or even $500,000 in order for everything to feel how you want it to feel. Don’t let yourself play into other people’s hype.Focus on what you want for yourself.
Full Disclosure: This is a part of 2 things.
#1: This is part of "How I Made My Dream Business A Reality: Confessions of An Entrepreneur's Path To Purpose & Freedom. It's a long(er) story so you can get the full PDF book version when you enter your name and email at the bottom of the post.
#2: This blog post is part of a project I started called Busting The Overnight Success Myth:: Community Blog Tour. This is just 1 of 21 stories where women in business are pulling back the curtain and sharing how they made their dream business a reality...including the not so pretty stuff. Jenn Scalia of Be Awesome On Purpose shared her story yesterday, and Shenee Howard of Hey Shenee, will be sharing hers tomorrow. You can find out more and check them all out here.
Enjoy!
xox Allison
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Back in 2010 I had observed enough online marketing to believe - that 1, as soon as I had the right mentor, and 2, figured out exactly what my niche/purpose/focus was that - I’d be golden.
I was under the impression that when I got both of those things sorted I’d be hitting 6 figures within the year. No problem. Everyone else seemed to be. It doesn’t take long to start noticing ‘strategies’ and steps to “6-7 figure businesses in 30 days” and “$5000 days in just 1 hour” are all over the place.
Those I was seeing celebrating their success seemed to have made it there overnight. What ISN’T talked about much is the behind the scenes journey to “overnight success” or rather the journey to making the “dream” a “reality.”
This could be contributing to you thinking things like:
“Why am I not ‘THERE’ yet?!”
“Will I ever get ‘there’?”
“Maybe I’m just not meant to have ‘that.’”
“What’s wrong with me?”
“What am I doing wrong!?”
At least those were a few of the things that were running through my head (and, heck, they still do!). For any of the people who seemed to reach this dream lifestyle overnight, there WAS a journey (probably a long one) to get to that point. A series of actions, meetings, jobs, learning and life experiences. That’s why I want to give you an intimate glimpse into my journey.
To share a story with you about how one shy, introverted, self doubting girl with a dream went from dreaming about the life she wanted to live to actually living it.
My hopes in sharing this is to bring both relief and hope to you if you’re getting disappointed or down on yourself for taking “too long” to get where you want to be or if you’re frustrated you aren’t getting the results you want. I want you to know that living a life of purpose, self expression and growth is an ever evolving journey. One that is truly about the journey and not so much the destination (and once you reach that destination there is just another journey and new destination ahead).
Even though this is my story, I have a feeling it’s yours too. We are each completely unique in the path we take, the combination of gifts and experiences we have and how we express them but what share in common are the thoughts and feelings we have along the way. So feel free to join me on a little confessional journey through my path to freedom and purpose. It has a happy ending, I promise.
2002
Throughout my school life I felt somewhat like a black sheep. I longed to fit in, but never felt like I did. Instead of embracing what made me different (which I didn’t totally understand or know yet) I half-assedly tried to be like everyone else, while secretly wanting to stand out. I felt really alone a lot of the time, despite having a great family and a few select friends around me.
I was not very self expressed or visible (a 5’11” wallflower) and was terrified of speaking to more than a few people at once. The few good friends I had were guys (I think I was more comfortable being myself with them, which included my natural comfort around sexuality that I didn’t feel safe expressing around women), and I found the girls around me to be really judgmental and uninterested in the things I was interested in. While growing up I believed that what I had to say wasn't of value or worth listening to and that no one was interested in who I really was (my parents are awesome btw, it probably was more instilled from early years in school).
I was on the honor roll but wasn’t super passionate or excited about anything I was learning. I considered myself a jack of all trades, and a master of none. I knew I didn’t want to go to University since there were no programs that had anything I was interested in. Yet, having experienced some pretty intense health issues, I felt inspired to explore working in homeopathy and naturopathic medicine.
I didn’t know for sure what I wanted to focus on yet but I knew I wanted whatever I did to be holistic. I also knew I wanted to have my own practice and did NOT want to work for a company. More than anything I wanted to travel. I had been working at an accounting office all throughout high school and saved diligently, while daydreaming about the ocean, sunshine and traveling.
2003-2004
Instead of going to school I backpacked for most of the year pondering my purpose, meeting new people, pushing my comfort zone, discovering the world of EDM (electronic dance music). This journey really got me more in touch with and comfortable in being myself. Especially dancing - the music seemed to take over and moving my body felt better than caring what other people were thinking. I started to get more in tune with my body which allowed me to trust it more.
There was a long way to go but this was a good start. At this point I also realized and started to appreciate how good I was with managing money (budgeting, saving, investing and living how I wanted on little cash… ) and how comfortable people were opening up and sharing things with me. I was often the person even strangers would confide in when it came to sharing their scariest dreams, weirdest thoughts, or guilt around their desires.
If you have something to share, come join us in the Soulful Success Tribe here.
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