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How To Use Comparison & Jealousy For Good

Jealousy and comparison can leave you with a yucky taste in your mouth and a pit in your stomach…maybe even some guilt or shame.

As easy as it would be to say “hey, just don’t feel that way!” or “Just don’t compare yourself” I think it’s safe to say you are human and chances are once in a blue moon you’ll find yourself doing it anyway.

Thinking to yourself…

  • How come she’s so far along and I’m not
  • Their design is so much better than mine
  • I wish I could write like that…

The point is comparison, competition and jealousy are things that occur pretty naturally, especially if you put yourself in situations where it’s more likely (ya, looking at 20 other peoples offerings while you’re trying to create your own isn’t going to help). So, you might as well use it to your advantage!

There’s 2 spins you can make on comparison and jealousy to spur you into positive action instead of a mopey slump of depression (leaving you NOT sharing your awesomeness with your Soul Mate Clients that are just waiting for you).

#1 Jealousy usually jumps up because there is actually a quality in the other person that YOU have that you consciously or subconsciously want to bring out more.

Up Spin: Jealousy is just a reminder of the awesome qualities you have but haven’t been putting as much attention on.

Example: Let’s say Sally has been launching like crazy and seems to be getting lots of attention and part of you is feeling jealousy and comparison creep in.  Then, as you look deeper, you realize you really want to amp up your visibility and action taking because you know you have that capacity.

#2 It brings clarity for new areas of growth and/or interest.

Want to pickup your skills in a new area, now is your chance.  Let the comparison you feel fuel your action to improve your skills and to grow and learn new things.  

Example: You start comparing yourself to someone because she’s an amazing writer.  You start feeling the “Why do I even bother!?” thoughts come on.  Take a moment to ask yourself…

“What about her writing do I love?”

“How can I cultivate more of that in my own unique way into my writing?”


So there you have it, 2 fun ways to make comparison and jealousy something to look forward to (well, maybe not quite) and spin it into something positive and productive.

Has there been a time when you felt less than, jealous or like you were comparing yourself to someone else?  What has been a positive lesson that you’ve learned?  Share with us by joining our sisterhood here.

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